Sandhya Garg · The Wedding Calendar, Part One
The Engagement Party
For the Bride-to-Be · For Guests · For Parents · By Dress Code · 12 Pieces, XS to 3XL
Quick Answer
Guests: start with the invitation's dress code. Cocktail is the most common, so a knee-length or longer dress is the safe default. Don't wear white unless the couple asks, and don't try to outshine them. Bride-to-be: you can wear white, but you don't have to. Blush, a bold print or the colour that suits you best often photographs better. Parents and hosts: one step more polished than the guests, and comfortable enough for hours on your feet.
The engagement party is the first event in a calendar that will run for months. After it come the bridal shower, the rehearsal dinner and the wedding itself. It's also often the most loosely defined. One couple has a backyard barbecue, another a black-tie dinner, a third a surprise party, and the invitation doesn't always say which.
So this guide starts with who you are at the party, then what kind of party it is. For the etiquette, I've leaned on the people who answer these questions all day: The Knot and WeddingWire. The styling is mine.
In This Guide
Bride-to-Be, Guest or Parent: What Changes
Guest of honour
The Bride-to-Be
White if you want it, but not required. You'll stand next to dozens of people in photos, so choose the colour that suits you best and put detail near your face: embroidery, a sculptural sleeve, one strong earring.
Celebrate, don't compete
Guests
Follow the dress code and choose colour over white. The Knot's line is a good one: when in doubt, it's "better to be overdressed than underdressed." Don't ask the couple what to wear. Ask another guest.
One step up
Parents and Hosts
A little more polished than the guests, coordinated loosely with the other family, never matching the bride. You'll be standing, greeting and refilling glasses, so a waist that adjusts matters.
What to Wear, by the Kind of Party
| The party | What to wear | From this edit |
|---|---|---|
| Backyard or brunch at home | Smart casual: a printed shirt dress, a sundress with a jacket, tailored trousers. Not denim shorts. | Versailles, Kimono |
| Garden or outdoor afternoon | A midi or maxi in colour, a block heel for grass, a layer for sunset. | Antonia, Fleur |
| Restaurant or rooftop dinner | Cocktail: a knee-length to midi dress, long sleeves in winter. | Queen, Louis, Sophie |
| Hotel ballroom or black tie | Floor-length, a formal colour, real jewellery. | Marquis, Duchess |
| Surprise party | You may not know the dress code. A wrap midi or shirt dress works at almost any level of formality. | Queen, Versailles |
If the engagement is being celebrated with an Indian ceremony such as a roka or a ring ceremony, the guidance is different: more colour, more embellishment, and often traditional dress. Start with What to Wear to an Indian Wedding, Event by Event, then browse the Indian wedding guest collection.
Three Rules Worth Keeping
1. Leave white for the bride. According to WeddingWire, brides usually wear white to pre-wedding events. Even a white-ground print can read as white in a photo. If you're unsure, choose another colour.
2. Wear colour in winter if you want to. Many people default to black for a cold-weather party, but you don't have to. Jewel green, royal blue and deep red are as formal as black and much better in photos. My guide to telling whether a colour suits you will help you choose.
3. Buy for the whole calendar. If you're close to the couple, you'll attend three or four events this year. A dress that works for an engagement party can come back for the rehearsal dinner with a different jacket. That's one reason I design pieces to be layered. See Investment Pieces: How to Tell Before You Buy.
The engagement party is the first event of the year. Buy something you'll want to wear to the next three.
The Engagement Party Edit · Let Them Eat Cake Collection
Twelve Pieces, From Backyard to Black Tie
Every print drawn in Los Angeles, printed and made in India, in small runs. Grouped by who you are and what kind of party it is.
For the Bride-to-Be
Daytime, Garden and Backyard Parties
Restaurant and Cocktail Parties
Formal Evening Parties
A Layer for Daytime
Dresses run XS to 3XL and jackets XS to XL. Stock is limited, so check the size selector on each product page · Size chart · Made to measure
What Comes Next in the Wedding Calendar
Each event has its own guide. They're written to work together, so a piece from this edit shows up again in each one.
Step 1 · You are here
Engagement Party
Step 2 · Daytime, softer
Bridal Shower →
Step 3 · Family, smaller
Rehearsal Dinner →
Step 4 · Every dress code
The Wedding →
Frequently Asked Questions
Can you wear white to an engagement party as a guest?
No, unless the couple asks you to. The Knot advises guests not to wear white to any wedding event, and WeddingWire notes that brides usually wear white to pre-wedding events. A print with a white background is a judgment call: if you're unsure, choose something else.
Does the bride have to wear white to her engagement party?
No. White is a lovely choice, and our white dresses are there if you want it. Blush, a bold print or a colour that suits you is just as right, and often photographs better next to the people you love.
What is the usual dress code for an engagement party?
Cocktail attire is the most common: a knee-length or longer dress, a dressy jumpsuit, or tailored separates. A daytime party at home can be smart casual, and a hotel or black-tie party calls for floor-length.
Can you wear black to an engagement party?
Yes, especially in the evening. Black is fine at a cocktail or formal engagement party. Add colour through a print, a jacket or jewellery if the party is during the day or outdoors.
What should the mother of the bride or groom wear to an engagement party?
Dress a step more polished than the guests and coordinate loosely with the other family, but don't match the bride. A wrap midi or a kaftan works for long hours of hosting. Our mother of the bride and groom guide covers the wedding day itself.
Keep Reading
Dress Codes
Every Wedding Dress Code, Explained
Casual to white tie.
Rehearsal Dinner
10 Rehearsal Dinner Dresses
For guests, by season.
Family
Mother of the Bride and Groom
What to wear on the day.
Prints
How to Wear Bold Prints
Even if you're nervous about them.
About the Writer
Sandhya Garg is a Project Runway Season 13 designer who won two challenges on the show and presented her collection at Mercedes-Benz New York Fashion Week. She studied womenswear at London College of Fashion and has worked at Alexander McQueen, Gucci, Liberty London and Alice Temperley. Her label has been featured in Marie Claire US, Elle, Cosmopolitan and Vogue online. Every print is drawn by Sandhya in Los Angeles and printed and made in India. Read her story.
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